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In Your Love, My Salvation Lies

Oct 17, 2008
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Jim&Ruth's.babies.2008.sept.dad's.funeral

Had my first dream about Dad since he died.
I remember most vividly the end of the dream because he looked so young and so handsome.

Earlier in the night, I had nightmare after nightmare.
It seemed that there were things and people lurking outside and I had no protector. People were going to use crowbars and come in. A strange car full of people sat in the driveway. Mom and I turned off the porch light and quietly locked the door (I think it was the house on Kane Place or wherever that street was in Penn Park) Then, something was going to cut off my hand or my foot. Terror.

Then at the end of the night, I was in a bi-plane with Dad. He was going to swan dive out of the plane when it swooped low over the ocean. Then I was in a boat that would pick him up. Suddenly the sky was full of Japanese Zeros, and they were dropping bombs into the ocean, flying very low, skimming the water. Dad arched out of the plane in a perfect swan dive and dove into the ocean. The Zeros kept trying to get closer and dropped their bombs. They didn’t seem to explode. By the time our boat got closer, others were picking him up. I think the other boats had strangers and Dad’s grandchildren in them. It struck me how handsome he was -- like he used to look, a young Paul Newman, very striking, and he looked relaxed and triumphant.

Then I woke up. I thought, well he was so promiscuous. It was about everybody else, not us. He preferred strangers and people he could impress. I told him I’d come for him, but he wanted to be admired by someone else. I didn’t count.

But it wasn’t hurtful. It was more like, “that’s just him.”.... Then I though, “Maybe it was the ancestors who had arrived to get him and take him to where he needed to go to be with the old Scots people." The grandchildren were actually the ancestors come to take him back "home." They appear as grandchildren so as to not be threatening. Perhaps the grandchildren are an 'encore' performance of ancestors who are still on a mission.

***

My brother Tom sent me an iTunes gift

Song: Orange Sky
Alexi Murdoch

You can listen to the song HERE
*

Well I had a dream I stood beneath an orange sky.
Yes I had a dream I stood beneath an orange sky,
with my brother standing by..
with my brother standing by.

Said, brother you know, you know, it’s a long road we’ve been walking on.
Yes it is, yes it is, you know, brother it is such a long road we’ve been walking on.
Oh brother, oh brother..

And I had a dream I stood beneath an orange sky
with my sister standing by,
with my sister standing by.

Said, here is what I know now, sister,
here is what I know, ‘goes like this:

In your love, my salvation lies, in your love, my salvation lies, in your love, my salvation lies, in your love, in your love, in your love.

Oh, but you know, I am so weary..
and you know, my heart, my heart’s been broken down.
Sometimes, sometimes my mind is too strong
to carry on.
Too strong, too strong to carry on.

But when I am alone, when I’ve thrown off the weight of this crazy stone,
when I’ve lost all care for the things I own,
that’s when I miss you, that’s when I miss you, that’s when I miss you —
you, who are my home.
You are my home.

And here is what I know now, here is what I know, goes like this:

In your love, my salvation lies, in your love, my salvation lies, in your love, my salvation lies, in your love, my salvation lies, in your love, my salvation lies, in your love, my salvation lies, in your love, my salvation lies, in your love, in your love, in your love.

Well I had a dream I stood beneath an orange sky..
Yes I had a dream I stood beneath an orange sky..
with my brother and my sister standing by..
with my brother and my sister standing by..
with my brother and my sister standing by.

These are lyrics by Alexi Murdoch, from 'Orange Sky'